Sunday, November 21, 2010

A Hard Week

The pavement was cold against me as I sat on the ground.
"Tell me what's wrong."
Paisley sat on the ground next to me, looking into my eyes. She could tell all day something was not right and brought me outside at lunch to talk.
As I told her about all that was bothering me, I was quickly brought to tears. She urged me to go on and I choked out a long list of the things that seemed to be going terribly wrong in my life. Near the end she said something about a boy and I began to sob. I leaned up against her and she held me and let me cry the rest of the time.

Lunch ended and I trudged down the hall, my eyes and face red and blotchy. People looked at me with strange espressions on their faces. During all of last period people were asking me what was wrong. I told them I had just been talking about some bad memories and they sort of shrugged it off after giving me several hugs.

I got home that day hoping things to be going uphill, but it didn't get better with the news about this girl. The journey with our dear Laika Lou is coming to a close. She's being put down this Tuesday.
I know she'll be happier in a place where she can run and play again, but the hardest thing thing to ever say to someone is goodbye.

Saturday we held a baby shower for my sister and it was my mom's birthday. We wanted it to be a happy day but we soon found out my mom's step dad fell and broke his hip. He already has lung cancer and now he's expected to die this week.

The world is crumbling around me all over again, but faster and harder than it was before.

5 comments:

  1. Tessa, you have been challenged in the past and at the time it seemed like a really big deal and probably was...but it strengthened you. The world is not crumbling around you, but just trying to make you stronger than you ever were before. I know you can do it Tessa, cause you're just that one of a kind awesome person!

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  2. I'm sorry you are having a fall apart week. Hang in there... "This too, shall pass". I love you and try to think of the good memories and being grateful that you knew your grandpa and that you were able to be the owner of a darling dog.

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  3. Oh Tessa! I feel so bad. I know you will make it through all of this. I know you've been in sticky situations before and you have gotten out of them just fine. Something will appen and you will be happy again don't you worry. If you need to talk, I am all ears. I love you.
    :)

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  4. Tessa things have to get worse to get better and i think your better should be very very soon!!!!!!!

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  5. I'm so sorry Tessa! I hope nothing else bad happens!

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